Grand Theft Auto as Saviour
I’m not necessarily the most gregarious person in the world but I do have the habit of talking to cashiers and saying hello to people I pass on the sidewalk, if I ever rode public transit I’d probably be that guy to give up his seat to a senior citizen even though I’m now 72; so I guess I may also lack some self awareness.
Being predisposed to a certain personality type makes me somewhat captive to these types of behaviours and then I make the false assumption that everyone else is of the same mind and manner and, well that’s just not a truth. Today, for example, I was in German Park, behind enemy lines, going for a lone walk looking at the beautiful mansions trying to peak into the windows. I even had a fantasy conversation worked out in case someone stopped me in this up scale neighbourhood and wanted to know what I was doing there.
My first response would be silence and then I would look left then right, slowly like I was panning with a cinematic camera and gearing up for a shoot of a final scene. I would say in a low voice “I’m actually casing the neighbourhood for an auto theft ring but I see by your 2012 BMW X3 that you are in no immediate danger.” I would wish him a good day and walk on before asking, “By the way do you know where the entrance to German Park is?”
I know that may not be friendly but it is engaging. As I enter the park a jogger passes me. I say my hello and he nods a greeting in my direction. He, soon followed by a younger man just walking, looking very serious, ignores my salutation. That gives me an immediate flashback to Woodstock where I lived a few years earlier and where my wife and I walked on similar trails and soon realized that this small southern Ontario town was likely one of the most unfriendly places on the planet perhaps secondly only to the anonymity of walking sidewalks on busy New York streets where one could streak and not be noticed.
In reclusive Woodstock we would make a point of saying very loud hellos to every single person who walked by us on a sidewalk or path and make a mental tally of how many responses we got back. Those tallies were easy as it was usually a zero sum game, as nobody or very, very few people ever, ever said hi, hello, nice evening, morning, afternoon whatever the case may be. It was a barren social wasteland of unfriendly walkers. They could all be stars on a Seinfeld episode along with the soup nazi. It was sadly demoralizing. We eventually had to move out of that city and find social connections elsewhere.
I mentioned I liked talking to cashiers and now I’m forever frustrated as there are more and more automated checkout cashiers with these brash, irritating, metallic, artificial, computerized voices. I don’t even like talking to them. I never greet them or say hello. They pretend to be friendly they may even be programmed to be friendly but I’m not buying it. I know real friendly when I see it and you know, sadly it’s getting harder and
harder to find. Certainly, it can’t be found on social media. That’s like going back to the New York sidewalk I just mentioned in the previous paragraph.
Social media is the biggest misnomer going. It uses the word social and by all accounts it has the potential to be social, statistically it has the number count to be social but in reality its like the guy on the path not saying hello or worse saying a sarcastic hello which is even worse. People on social media say and do all sorts of mean things because there are no laws, meaningful guidelines, ethics, controls or realistic restraints to stop those who are basically insane who walk amongst us. I mean I at least feel bad about thinking about saying to a complete stranger I work for a auto theft ring, but that was just a sad private joke in bad taste. People troll and politic on Facebook and elsewhere and there is no respect for opinion, opinion is void of factual basis and tolerance is a virtue long dead as all the vices one can imagine seem to populate the net.
Now that I no longer find enjoyment in life on pathways, sidewalks, with cashiers or on social media the world has become much smaller. Something in me has been pushed to the limit as our society oddly looks for truckers to solve our problems, lacks a belief in science but looks to televangelism to save them and seems fearful of any type of diversity. Maybe I’m just at loose ends because the Queen died this week and we grew up together so to speak. I just don’t know any more.
I have made the only logical decision and joined an auto theft ring in Scarborough and am now cruising a neighbourhood near you.
